My portfolio will be focused on some type of immorality found in my weekly stories, with the end goal of creating an immorality alphabet. This theme is inspired by A Moral Alphabet by Hilaire Belloc.
As of now, my portfolio will consist of a revised version of my original story, but with a short poem describing the immoral theme I saw within the original story or even in my own.
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(D)eceit & (G)reed: Shortcut to Treasure :
Taking shortcuts isn't always a good idea, especially when the motivation is greed. When you deceive others in the process, well, that's even worse. Fables are full of moral lessons, and that's from which the first story of my portfolio is derived.
(M)urder & (T)heft: Life & Death, Horror & Theft :
Taking things without permission is something you should never do. Taking a life with the intention may arguably be worse. But what if you steal in order to heal; does that make it right?
(J)ealousy & (A)dultery: The Chronicles of the Wonderful Turtle :
If you look to hard at what you lack, you may lose track of the good you already have. Jealousy is known to often emerge in relationships; does that ever end well?
(P)ride & (V)engeance: The Feathers :
If you get too high on your horse, you'll probably just look like a jackass. Acting against something that caused you harm may be justified, but if you hold on too long and let it turn into vengeance your character will suffer.
I think your idea of an immoral alphabet is awesome! I have never heard of this style before, but I think you did a great job representing it to the reader. Your Deceit rhyme has to be one of my favorite aspects of your story! Great story overall! I really liked the treasure hunting aspect you wove into the story. I would love to know more of a backstory of where John found the parchment map! I think this backstory would be a great addition to your story. You did a great job of getting the moral of the story across! I was intrigued by your poems at the beginning, but it wasn’t until I reached the moral of the story that I was able to fully understand why you chose those two words for your immoral alphabet! Your story had a great flow and made me wary of ever taking the easy path! Great job!
ReplyDeleteThe idea for your portfolio sounds very interesting. I read the Life & Death, Horror & Theft story. The title even slightly rhymes. Your creativeness and descriptions made the story more intriguing. But the ending was definitely a cliff hanger. You have to write what happens next, or not if you do not plan on doing so. Either way, it made me want to read more about it.
ReplyDeleteThe twist was great. I never thought that it would happen. Although it was from the original story, I am glad that you kept it. It makes me want to read the original story.
Like Alec said in the original blog post of the story, monks are not usually supposed to have a wife. You should add a brief sentence or two stating how or why he became a monk within the story even though you add it in your author’s note. Another method could be the first time you mention him, you can even say that he is a new monk or something similar.